Remind me how to love

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Tenny parked her car by the roadside and entered the market, she needed to get some groceries from the market. As soon as she entered the market, a young guy dressed in tattered clothes walked up to her, "Aunty, please give me money for food..... I am hungry" he said and demonstrated as he spoke, Tenny could tell that he wasn't lying because he actually looked hungry but she felt nothing close to pity for him. She looked at him again expecting to feel something for him but she couldn't. When she looked at him, all she could see was the bitter experience she had with her older Cousin when she was a teenager. She wanted so badly to see beyond that but she couldn't. She left the market, confused, and entered her car where she broke into tears.  "I've forgotten how to love...... Please remind me" she cried.
She graduated with a first class honour in Adeleke University where she studied pharmacy. She had a job at one of the best five pharmaceutical stores in the city yet she wasn't married. Infact, marriage was even high.... Because she couldn't even go into a simple friendship with a guy because she couldn't see beyond the bitter experience she had years back. Many people have tagged her to be a lesbian, feminist and all sorts of disturbing names because of her attitude towards the male folks......
We have ladies like Tenny today who are going through similar experiences. We even have guys also going through the same today. Experience, they say is the best Teacher but we shouldn't allow this teacher be our dictator.

It is good to learn from our experiences but we mustn't make it dictate to us, tell us what to do all the time and how to do it all the time. A bad experience could make you a bad person only if you want your experience to dictate to you. Tenny forgot how to love because she had experienced hatred for the better part of her life. However, for us to be reminded how to love,  we have to follow the following steps:
We have to love ourselves first.
 You can't give what you don't have, learn to love yourself and this way, you would be able to remember how to love.
Talk to someone about your bitter experience. 

 Please note that this person must be someone you can trust to an extent. I will recommend a person which you can stay anonymous with or your parent.

Never blame yourself.
There's nothing you could have done to avoid it, get off that guilt wagon and enter the train of freedom
Laugh about it......
Make jokes... Read jokes....listen to jokes.....Laugh... Let your life be filled with laughter and funny things.

Read books that can help you.
I am a Christian and one book that helps me is the Bible so I'll recommend it to you.





There are other things you can do but just make sure that you accept yourself, believe in yourself and love yourself.

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